Music and songwriting have always been great ways for artists to establish themselves and their personalities, and for a performer to announce who they are to the world.
But what if you’re not quite sure who you are yet? What if you’re writing music and developing a voice and a style for yourself while you’re right in the middle of a major change or a major period of questioning everything that you’ve been raised to believe?
Well, if you’re Oklahoma-based singer, songwriter, saxophonist, and habitual sideman Adam Ray, you embrace the change and let all that uncertainty be your guide.
That’s how Ray conceived and wrote “Paradise,” the debut full-length album from his new project Adam & The Original Sin.
It’s a surprisingly upbeat collection of songs driven and inspired by a period of religious reckoning for Ray, when he found himself questioning, confronting, and ultimately pulling away from the strict, religious upbringing of his earlier life.
Adam Ray: It was me trying to overcome the guilt and shame that came with the upbringing in high-control religion.
So when I finally decided to sit down and write something about my experience, spiritual-wise, it came out as more sarcastic and like a satire. It's a satire of all my spiritual and biblical upbringing.
It was right before 2020, I decided, well, that was when I was trying to start healing from my childhood trauma stuff. First of all, writing in the journal, and then those becoming lyrics, all of that was helpful to me to process it all.
And then I wanted to share it, because I'm sure - I'm positive - other people are dealing with religious trauma and all the stuff I was dealing with, to help other people, point other people to healing, and to, like, getting rid of the guilt and shame that comes with it.
Brett Fieldcamp: That desire to confront and express those feelings was Ray’s motivation to jump back into personal songwriting, something that he hadn’t explored for years, even as he had evolved into a respected and in-demand sax player and sideman in OKC’s rock and pop scenes.
Adam Ray: I didn’t do any singer-songwriter stuff for probably 15 years.
I've been a professional musician the whole time, mostly, you know, as a saxophone player, but as far as writing songs, I hadn't done that in a long time. Probably because the last songs I wrote were, like, worship songs, so…
Brett Fieldcamp: But just as he was coming out of the vulnerabilities and insecurities of transitioning away from the rigid world of his upbringing, Ray has found himself navigating a new transition: stepping out of the sideman role and into the spotlight as the singer, face, and force behind Adam & The Original Sin.
Adam Ray: That's what I've always done, has just been a side man. Like I started out, saxophone was my main instrument, and so you usually aren't like a lead musician who plays saxophone. That's not like a typical thing.
So I have been like the rock and roll sax guy for sure. Like other people would get more calls for jazz, but I would definitely get more calls for pop and rock stuff.
I found it very difficult, then, to transition into being the front man and having my face on stuff and marketing myself. That does not come naturally to me. Being the front man was a totally different thing.
Brett Fieldcamp: With five years’ worth of writing, recording, and refining the tracks that make up “Paradise,” it’s taken a long time for Ray to grow into his new role and his new outlook on life, the universe, and everything.
But without all of the work spent changing his perspective and confronting his feelings of doubt and insecurity, he likely never would’ve gotten over the final hurdle of casting off his perfectionism to finally release the record to the world.
Adam Ray: I struggled with that for a long time, because I wanted it to be so perfect.
I heard some advice that we're in the digital age, an album doesn't have to be a final album. Like it's all digital. There's no reason for gatekeeping.
A little bit of me is like, my parents are getting older and retiring, and I'm in another phase of life now. My kids are graduating. I start thinking about my legacy, and I'm like “well, if I die right now, this whole thing's on Dropbox and nobody's gonna see it. I need to get this thing out.”
I decided it doesn't have to be perfect. I'm gonna put it out. It's more, to me, about, like, I'm not trying to hit a million listeners on Spotify. I'm just trying to put my art out there and hope it connects with people.
Brett Fieldcamp: The debut album “Paradise” by Adam & The Original Sin is available now exclusively on Soundcloud, with a wider streaming release set for later this year.
For more, follow @adamandtheoriginalsin on Instagram.
For On the Scene, I’m Brett Fieldcamp. Now here’s Adam & The Original Sin with “Trailer Next Door.”
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